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The world is coming to an end in three days, and God wants to warn the world. So he decides to bring the three most important people into Heaven so they can relay the massage. He calls up the JokeMaster, Bill Clinton and Bill Gates, and tells them the story. When they get back down Clinton calls a Press conference and tells the country: "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is there is a god, and the bad news is the world is coming to an end in three days." The JokeMaster calls a meeting at The Humour Network and tells them, "I have some bad news and some worse news. The bad news is I'm not really god, some other guy is; and the worse news is that the world is coming to an end in three days." Then Bill Gates gets on the 'net and e-mails his company: "Hey guys, guess what; I have some good news and some great news! The good news is God thinks I'm one of the three most important people in the world. The great news is I don't have to fix all the bugs in Windows 2000!"
Saddam Hussain visits God and asks him: "God when shall I see the defeat of Bill Clinton." God replies: "Son, you will not see it in your lifetime." Hearing this, Saddam Hussain starts crying and goes away.Once Laloo Prasad Yadav visits God and asks him: "God when shall I see Bihar becoming a prosperous and happy state." God replies: "Son, you will not see it in your lifetime." Hearing this, Lallo starts crying and goes away. Then Gen. Parvez Musharaff visits God and asks him: "God when shall I see the capture of Kashmir by Pakistan." Hearing this, God starts crying. Musharaff is astounded and asks: "God, why are you crying?" God replies: "Son, I will not see it in my lifetime"
Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
Son : Well, where did you get mummy then?

The girl asked her lover, "Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?"
Sure," replied her lover "What's your phone number?"
Customer : 'If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Brighton in two days'time?'
Post Master : 'Well it might do.'
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to London.
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Rohit Kumar Khode
B-111, Fifth Hall of Residence
Indian Institute of Technology, Kanpur
India-208016
rkkhode@iitk.ac.in
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